I’ve been pondering a lot lately (also I’ve been way busy with the last crazy semester of my course.) I made the actuve decision somewhere during this year to be more active, to movs my body, to nourish it with food thats both good and try to believe and lovd in myself. If anyone who reads this knows me, they know how obsessed I am with Lorna Jane, I’m sure my friends are sick of seeing all my hash tags! I stumbled along Move. Nourish. Believe. by chance and I haven’t looked back, but my confession is that I don’t always follow this. There are times where I just can’t fit in a workout or I’m unable to make nourishing meals, or i hate myself, but this is okay. Because I make up for it the next day.
Along with all of the changes I’ve made in my life, I’ve lost some friends. One of whom I actually believed to be a true friend. It was over something that they promised wouldn’t wreck the relationship and all I wanted to do was give them a chance to have something of theirs that was published. It was also the piece that was the best one in the collection, but that’s okay. The issue? I live with them and now there are awkward hi’s and ignoring. I was initially angry, I wanted to understand why the friendship had to end the way it did. I guess I’ll never know and I’m realising that I’m okay with that. I’m letting them go and wishing them the best, whatever may happen.
I’ve stumbled along some pretty rocking women these past couple of seeks. First it was Melissa Ambrossini which has lead me to Tara Bliss and Rachel Mahagy and the Universe kept thrusting them into my life. I resisted for as long as I could until I knew I had to accept them into my life. I took a leap and downloaded their beautiful ebooks (everyone needs to get their hands on the 12 Steps of Wellness and Spirited) and I have to say, their words have resonated with me on a level that I didn’t expect. For the first time I am facing making my own decisions and I had no idea if I was ready to, but I know I am now. I’m more than ready. I’m ready to tackle the hard obstacles that are in my way. I’m ready to accept whatever is coming my way and I’m going to do it. If I have to go without electricity to pay my rent, I will. If i have to restrict spending, I will. I’m taking control.
I’m already taking chances. If I have tingly feelings about something and it’s scary, I’m going to do it. I took the chance with Body Attack all those weeks ago and now I’m obsessed. It’s amazing (I’m still trying to talk myself into being able to get the whole class down in one go, but I’m nearly there pulsing lunges and squat, dammit I will get you down.) I’ve also started with my blog. I’m trying to change it into something that I can use professionally. I’m going to try and update it regularly. I’m going to make the effort to write more. I owe it to myself to do so and it’s a shame I haven’t done more (uni really has been hectic!)
So here it is. I’m going to do this and no one is going to stop me. I’m doing this for me.